Remember When...

Hey, remember when you punched yourself in the stomach? No? Oh, thats right. Instead you just did like a bazillion jack knifes. Man, I kind of wished I had been punched though. That would be a better story.

Maybe I should start talking to my stomach like someone would do to a plant. My trainer says it takes time, but god damn it I've been workin foreva and nothin. Well I found a good battery for my CD player, so well, that was positive.

Hair Cut

I am going to get a hair cut this weekend. I was planning on growing my hair out for the wedding, but whats the point? I like it shorter. I might want to dye it again to the nice auburn it was for a while, but then a lot of people have that color right now and too often people think I am copying them. I swear its not copying! I had red hair for most of college!

I can't decide. Arg, why is your wedding so important? Why can't I just roll out of bed and have everything done for me? No such luck.

My bridal shower invitations have been sent out and they are beautiful. Renee did an awesome job. I am really excited! I am worried about Adam's mom coming to town for a week. Oh, by the way, you wont see me because I will be entertaining my mother-in-law. I have a mother-in-law!

Blam!

Brass Tacks

I have reached the plateau. Its the plateau I always reach. I could work out and eat nothing for the next twenty five years and still be my size. Arg. It makes me angry, but whatever. It only makes me angry because for all my hard work it really never will be considered an acheivement, and naturally skinny girls are praised for their weight, even though they may have never walked into a gym.

I recently saw photos of myself, and even though I know I lost 20 lbs I still look the same as I did six months ago. When I am at home alone I have absolutely no problem with me. I see my problem areas, as anyone does, but the rest seems pretty good to me. Maybe surrounding myself with tiny girls doesn't help.

Blah. I am a hot momma, and if you can't handle it, well then get back to the kitchen. ?

- - Side Note:
I would like to state on the record that I think it is perfectly fine to be my size if you are A)active AND B)heatly. I work out all the time. I also teach a physically challenging gymnastics class in which I 100% participate. I do not advocate inactivity. I have low cholesteral and low blood pressure. There is nothing I take more pride in than watching a young child who is overweight work harder because they see that I am overweight and I can do anything I put my mind to.

I think it is perfectly healthy to have a larger person as a role model, even in the media, as someone who is active but may not have the perfect body.

Ping

He moved the fork between his
two fingers
before dropping it
to the plate
only to realize that
she had gone
and the
fork
was all he
had.

Out of Touche?

My titles don't even make sense anymore.

So I am getting more and more excited about moving to NYC. Renee is leaving July 12, and I am going to be so sad! I can't beleive how soon it is and how much I am going to miss her. She was one of my first true friends here in Los Angeles. I am so glad that when I leave Los Angeles I can look forward to seeing her in NY! Its crazy, but she is going to be my friend for a very long time. I really appreciate her setting up my bridal shower last minute.

I'm at a point where I just don't care about pissing people off and frankly I have been too concerned with people pissing me off! I realized I am extremely out of touch with many members of my circle, you could say. I have been for a long time. For a while I thought it was my fault, but its not. The way I think is just way different than some. My priorities are different, my goals are different. Most want to be successful or find that super cool thing. I just want to buy a house and pay my bills. I think moving to NYC will be good for me. I am moving from playing adult to actually being an adult.

W is for Weekend!

What did I do this weekend? Let's see, how about watch the scariest movie ever created The Descent!. That movie was a freakin blood bath of horror. I am so glad I watched it in an open arena, rather than in a dark cramped theatre. I think I would have run out of the theatre screaming. Instead I just looked up and reminded myself I was not 100 feet below the earth's surface being eaten alive by crazy white creatures! This movie was so scary a man PASSED OUT! Ask Corinne, it happened.

The next night I had to go see Nacho Libre to compensate. Funny. Although the people we went with complained the whole time. Boo.

I also watched King Kong this weekend. The whole time Adam and I felt like something was missing. It was too much wonder for the island and not enough focus on making us care about the charecters. I really only cared about Adrian Brody, Tom Hank's son, and Jimmy. The rest, well, they could die. Why did they go on the island to save the chick? I mean, way more people died than necessary. Just go home. And Jack Black. I can't decide if he did a good job and the story just wasn't there to back him up, or if he did a horrible job and the movie was ruined because of him. I don't know!

Friday Byeday

I am really good at my job. Most of the other jobs part of the time I felt like I was not quite good enough, or it was boring, but not this job. Man, HR is so much fun. I don't know why. What a strange thing to discover. I also love working for the YMCA. There is just something about working at a place all about helping others and bettering yourself. Its such a good enviroment.

Yeah, I worked out this morning. Hence the happy glow.

Why Does it Feel Like Friday?

Oh right, because I worked on Sunday. Last night I fell asleep at 6:30 p.m. Yup. You heard me right. I have been crazy stressed and busy.

What does that sentance mean "crazy stressed and busy"? Did I just turn stress and busy into nouns and make them crazy, like insane? Is stress running around with underwear on it's head and pencils up it's nose? What about busy? Did it start talking to itself again?

Wow...where was that going?

In real life I have nothing to talk about.

Its 6 AM Crazy Lady

I am here at work and it is 6:30 A.M.

I do not lie.

My body is not going to last long. Maybe I can curl up underneath the desk for just a little bit.

Save Diamond D

Its a sad state of affairs when Screech can loose his house. Save Diamond D's House by buying his T-shirts.

This is actually really funny, but I must not laugh for Screech has had enough laughter and now it is all tears.

I hated Saved by the Bell. Why did everyone like that show?

Alert! I Am Busy!

I wrote that title at 9:45 a.m. and I am now writing the body at 12:00 p.m. I wonder when I will finish?! Only time will tell!

The stress train has rolled in and wont be departing until September, and even then there might be a delay.

Man, that was lame.

Okay. I guess I'll finish now.

Pictures!

My dad sent my pictures of Fred




He is only 6 weeks old. He lives in his carrier case because he likes cold dark places. My dad found him in an alley by the hospital. It cries all the time, even when it is eating. Meow, chomp, Meow, chomp. Fred is awesome.

Got to Look Classy

3 more months til the wedding! I am starting to freak out just a little. Not about Adam. He is so the one. More over getting the last few things done, like the rings and the alterations on my dress. Oh, and don't forget the veil. Ah!

I woke up again last night at 2:30 a.m. from a nightmare. I am having those more often. This weekend is going to be about sleep, since I haven't had any.

Also, as a note, it is not polite to call someone for directions if you don't want the person finding out where you are going.

Baja Too Fresh

I was just asked out.

Yes I was!

I am not lying!

Short Play
by Elizabeth

A young lady carrying a Baja Fresh bag is followed by a young man in a parking garage.

Young Man: "Is that any good?
Me: "Baja Fresh? Uh no. I'm just picking this up for someone"
Young Man: "Well thats nice of you."'
Me: "Well, its my job."
Young Man: "Where do you work"
Me: "At the YMCA"
Young Man: "Really? Down the street?"
Me: "Yes, you should check it out some time"
Young Man: "So do you live around here?"
Me: "Not really, more near west hollywood."
Young Man: "Awesome."
Me: "So are you lost? Did you loose your car?"
Young Man: "Uh, yeah. Whats your name?"
Me: "Elizabeth. Well this is my car. Nice to meet you."
Young Man: "So, do you want to have coffee or hang out sometime?"
Me: "Uh, I am engaged. Sorry."
Young Man: "Well, good luck with that."

End Scene.

Retro Fit

Hey remember this? Yeah, well its awesome:

Unexpected

Finding a person in your pocket
well, that's unexpected.
I go to a friend's party,
drive a stranger home,
and there it is,
a person falling into my pocket.
I study him, like I study a penny,
to see if he should remain
tucked away next to my hip bone.
I leave him there
forgetting I was ever without.
I wear the same pants everyday
just so I don't have to empty my pockets.

Cat Named Fred

My parents just got a new little kitty named Fred. That is an awesome name. Now Evelyn will have a playmate at my parent's house. I have no pictures of Fred so just imagine what he looks like.

Do it.

Cute, right?

Morning Glory Glory

People be over last night til 11. It be great. We be watching vibes.

Arg, its like nails on a chalk board!

Vibes was awesome, as always. Not everyone understood, but I know it touched them deeply, because someone has had sex on this table.

I disagree with my friend Paul and think Jeff Goldblum totally gave the performance of his life. He was finally given the freedom to be the weirdo we know and love. He was robbed of an oscar I tell you.

Curry Noon Delight

I had a nightmare last night. It woke me at 3:30 a.m. and afterwards every worry I had just rushed up. Blah. I've been too depressed on this thing lately. Happy times!

I like my self portrait. When I read it to Adam he thought I was calling myself fat. In my head I wasn't. It is what it is and I like it.

I am teaching gymnastics by myself today. I can hopefully work off lunch, which was free, which means awesome. I feel a little weird about it. Is everyone going to be looking at me like I don't belong? It's the last class so the parents will be watching. Scary!

Self Portrait

I am tall for a girl
Big for a woman
Enormous for a bride
and a house of a wife.

Miss Me Yet?

So Adam and I are moving. We have not decided when, but we are. I have yet to have a sit down talk with anyone about it. I know how I feel, but right now I am trying hard not to influence Adam's decision about it.

He wants to move, but moving requires a lot for him to give up so really I am letting him make all the decisions, like when we leave and where we go. When I moved back to New Jersey three years ago I only returned because I wanted to be with Adam. I had no intention of living in Los Angeles. Three years later here I am. Its okay, but I am so a family person its not even funny. I can't imagine having a house here, or raising a family. But I stayed here because Adam has this great company and he is happy.

Problem is he hasn't been happy lately. He misses his family, he doesn't make enough money, and he wants to start his own family with his own home. All of these things equal move back to the east coast. When my best friend Renee and her fiance Tye announced they were going to move, well it kind of got Adam and I thinking more seriously about a plan to move back home. We always talk about it but never make any plans. I said I always knew what I wanted, but it really was all up to him. I would stick by him whatever he chose and would be happy anywhere as long as I was with him. He chose to move back to the east coast.

So now its just waiting to see when he wants to do it. I know a lot of people think I am pushing him into moving, but if I was like that I would have demanded we move at least 2 years ago. In reality I want him to make his own decision. I don't want him to regret moving. So I'll keep you posted on what he decides.

Giant Green Jello

Last night I dreamt of a party where everyone was drinking ice cream float glasses filled with green jello squares. Clearly that is also what the Salt Lake City people dream about too as it is their official snack.

Things you learn.

Now I just want jello.

I Dont Think I'm Awake Yet

This morning I had the strangest feeling like I hadn't woken up yet. I was still asleep dreaming about driving into work. I still feel like that. Am I asleep? Wake up! Or better yet, sleep, sleep, cus mommy's tired.

Adam and I watched the Davinci code last night on the world premier 4x digital screening. It was amazing. The screen was so big! Adam scoffed at my amazement, but seriously it was awesome. I think we are going to see cars next week the same way. We saw the preview with the new digital projector, and man, we were in the back and we could see every little detail. Awesome.

Yeah the Davinci code was all right. I am glad I paid $0 dollars to go see it. I didn't like the book that much and still the book was better. Boo.

I am very excited for this movie tomorrow. Renee, Kristen, possibly Leslie, Corinne, and possibly even more! I mean what is more powerful than Peter Faulk, Jeff Goldblum and Cindy Lauper? I say nothing.

Wednesday Vibes

So Wednesday night I am going to have a little shindig at my place to watch Vibes. You heard it, Vibes, the best movie ever. Everyone should come. Maybe there will be pizza.

Waking Up Tired

I am tired.

This weekend was a much needed break. After May Day on Friday Adam and I just lounged.

May Day was fun. I brought some friends and that was really awesome. We may not have won any awards, but it won an award in my heart. (puke). I had a great time and all without an ounce of alcohol. Kristen and I took some awesome pictures and scared half the audience with our crazy dances.

Some highlights:
Corinne - Awesome. I was so glad she won, because, well, I voted for her. (by the way I had a few write ins myself! - although not sure why. Not really my best performance.)

Team Atrox - I knew they would bring the funny, and they did! Most liked Jeff the best, and while he was super funny I think Paul was the real funny man there. I mean, did you see him? Funny guy! They won best line and they deserved it!

I didn't agree with most of the other wins. My sense of funny is different than other people I guess.

The rest of the weekend was just relaxing. Adam watched some soccer and I did some puzzles. I like puzzles. We also watched the Squid and the Whale. Man that movie is hard to watch. Those parents! I screamed at the TV so many times. They were all awful people. It was written so well and was a good movie, but I don't see how I could ever see it again. My entire high school was filled with kids like the older son. Ug.

Dilly Dally

I have nothing to say today, but I feel like typing.

My best friend Renee is the awesomest, has been for 6 years, plus we totally wear the same shoes all the time.

I really hate Los Angeles bagels.

Everyone should come to May Day, and totally write my name in (there is a space to do that!) for best actress. (I probably should mention that I am not one of the nominees, but that shouldn't stop you from writing me in! Do it! Do it for your Grandma! Grandma's love me!)I don't deserve it for reals, but I deserve it in my brain, so please my brain and vote for me!

In all sincerity I have heard very good things about these movies. I am excited to see everyone's hard work and I hope some people like our movie. Go Team Meat! Team Meat Anagram! Yaaaaaa!

Never Go To Bed Angry

Or never talk about important things that make Adam angry before you go to bed, because then you dream of missing school and pigs.

I ordered a Psychic Bunny T-Shirt. You should all order a
Psychic Bunny T-Shirt. I'm getting the Bunny Launch shirt, so don't pick that one, because I will just look better in it than you. Well, thats a lie. I just don't want you to look better than me in it. Because I will cry. Boo hoo hoo.

The Car is Mine

Everyone should visit my Wedding Page. It is pretty awesome.

The car is back. I am afraid. Don't eat me car!

May Day is this friday. Everyone should totally come because it shall be awesome. Remember, I don't speaka so good.

I watched the Family Stone last night. It was awful. I hated almost all of the charecters and then suddenly they are all one big happy family. I didn't get it. Plus Sarah Jessica Parker looked like a beat up whore throughout the whole movie. Was that the point? She was a hooker? I have no idea. Just don't see it. Of all that is holy, don't see it. Plus, one of the most disturbing love scenes I have ever seen.

Now watching Mean Girls, well I could watch that over and over. Not really sure why, but then I remember because its really funny. Hey remember the rap song in the middle with KG? Yeah, good times.

10 Things I Hate about Los Angeles

Or...10 reasons why I want to move back east right now!

1. I won't have to buy plane tickets for my own wedding.
2. I can borrow my folks car, or just take the train into work, rather than taking the slow, slow bus.
3. I can actually visit my grandfather rathter than vaguely receiving messages about his well being.
4. I can spend some time with my brother, whom I haven't seen more than a dozen times in the last six years.
5. I can get free stuff from my relatives.
6. I can see the fall.
7. I can actually go home for christmas.
8. I can start saving money for a home, or better I can eventually afford a home.
9. I can sing on a regular basis.
10. I can see my fiance happy all the time from being near his family and feeling loved by everyone.

Can I move today? Because man, I am getting sick of this place.

Count Backwards from 10

Just heard word about my car. Some sensor thing or some bullshit like that. 10...9...

I want to thank John and Jeff for helping Adam and I with our car. They were ready and willing to move my car, but luckily for all the car started as soon as John arrived. After that was a lovely time at Shakeys Pizza. I like their plan of making a regular night of it with more people. I like events that I can walk to.

I have to keep thinking of lovely things like that to get me through my day because man, I am having trouble not throwing my chair over right now. Roar!! 8...7...

With so much going on I can't beleve I am spending close to 1,500 dollars on my car. Yes, you heard it. Over the past 2 months that will be the total cost of my car, other than the monthly payments and gas. Maybe the money fairy can fly over head and grant me money wishes because I have no idea how I can do...well...anything. 6...5...

I am just going to be angry, so fuck the rest of the countdown. I didn't even make it.

How Do I Describe Thee, Let Me Punch You In The Face

I really like saying "punch you in the face." Its happening.

So this weekend was highly overshadowed by my car's temper tantrums. Really, if it wanted attention it should have just said so instead of stalling on the freeway on a hot saturday afternoon. Baby, come back to me.

The car is in the shop now. I had to take the bus this morning, which isn't necessarily bad but I wasn't prepared so I arrived at my work 1/2 hour late.

My grandfather seems to be okay. They really wont know how bad the injury is until he heals up a little bit. My family is estimating he will go right into rehab. That is probably the best because knowing my grandfather he will push himself too hard and then break something else. You know how he broke his thigh bone? He decided (he is 85) that it would be a good idea to stand on a chair to fix the doorbell. Unfortunatly he forgot to take the cushion off the chair and it slipped. After he fell off the ladder, and the roof, he has been instructed not to climb things anymore. Does he listen? Of course not! But thats my grandpa, and really I like that he is that kind of guy.

This weekend there were parties, and Shakeys Pizza, and the Al Gore movie, and lasagna, oh and a cat in a shirt. By the way, evelyn is out of the cone and into a shirt. Its hillarious.

So yeah, life blows, but there is really nothing I can do about it so I can't get too sad. So I'll just keep punching you in the face. Pow!

When the Day Turns Into Fudge

I should probably follow up the previous post. I have yet to speak to my grandfather or my parents. I did speak to my brother and they are all planning on visiting him on Wednesday. That means it is not serious enough to warrent and general alert, but enough that they are paying him a visit. My Grandpa has broken many a bone and I am sure he will be fine, although how do you break a thigh bone? Ouch.

Being alone at work has been great. I got a lot done on my wedding. If you plan on attending my wedding please check out my Wedding Website to book your hotel rooms. They will go fast I tell you. Plus, it will be awesome.

The Pay Me To Be Alone

My grandfather broke his thigh bone in the middle of the night.

No one is going to be at work except me.

Strange day.

End of the Line of Toast

Dont ask me what that title means. I don't know.

Its been a long day, but I got free lunch, so its okay.

The wedding stuff is starting to actually get a bit stressful. There is a lot of stuff that I still need to do, and more importantly, pay for. God damn wedding is taking all that I have! All of it! And then more so, because I am not paying my bills. Oh man, getting married is like having your car break down every weekend.

huh, I bet I am the only one who has ever said that.

Maybe not.

May Day in June

Well the trailer is up for MAY DAY. You see me chasing Adam with a stick. Whats new?

Ha, I am so funny.

The screening is May 9. Be there.